Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Friends are powerful

I'm not sure if I really blogged about some of the emotional side effects of helping plan and attend my Ex boyfriends sister's funeral...

While I knew it would be a bit awkward with certain people for obvious reasons, what I wasn't expecting was for people who call me their friend to my face flip and pull a 180 and shut me out and make me feel like an outsider and the plague.

What makes it more ironic is that those same people who shut me out were once the people I defended and befriended when no one else would. So instead of being my friend they chose to side with the very people who isolated them...

A sad eye opener, but I got through the day and was there for my Ex and his family members and that's what counted and that's what mattered. While I may have received some insight I wasn't planning on gleaming that day, in hindsight, I'm now glad it happened.

I learned something slightly profound through the experience. It's not about the quantity of friends you have... but the quality of the friends you have and keep season after season in your life. While i'll admit that yes, the rejection and the inability to "be my friend in public" hurt and put me in a bit of a funk for a week or two, I came out on the other side a little wiser and really grateful for the friends I do have.

Its funny how when you get low, your real friends come out of the woodwork to lift you back up again.

  • Out of the blue my friend who's away up north at college started texting me just to catch up and chat about halloween and how it would be lame since we couldn't have her annual party this year since she's stuck at school... We chatted for a bit and it was nice to just reconnect.
  • One of my friends joined the planning committee for an event i'm running at work so I get to see him once a month now at our meetings... 
  • When my best friend heard I was in a funk and feeling friendless she came over on her way home from work at the spur of a moment and had dinner with me and my husband so we could just hang out for an hour or so.
  • And then my old marathon training buddy called me up and we worked out a new training plan and started working on it and now I get to see her once a week. To top that off, at the Halloween party we went to, another gal said she'd love to join us and train for the marathon too...
  • Our friends from Utah emailed us a baby bump photo and it was nice to be able to kind of connect with them on their journey to being parents even though were so far away right now...
  • My "bro" is all down for helping me do a Team for the event i'm planning at work... 

I could keep going.

Sometimes its more important to focus on the good things and people in your life and not focus so much on the loss or the supposed loss that comes from change.

Sometimes its just healthy to let go of the past and love where you are in life.

1 comment:

  1. Great post. I agree, it's about the quality of friends that you have.