My mother and my conviction

A few of you faithful readers from the beggining will remember the reason i moved into an apartment in the first place... My mother and her alcohol. I gave her an ultimatum. Me or the Booze... she chose it over me... I moved out and stopped talking to her, but left the door open if she wanted to get clean and sober... to change.... over time she started getting clean, wanted her daughter back into her life.... So we began to try to have a relationship.

During this struggle, I, on a whim, ran sacked the house a few months back, found 6 bottles of her alcohol of choice, left them out in plain sight with a note and waited for the call... She claimed she slipped but was going to do better... i kept my distance but still remained in contact. While I stopped our weekly lunches, I did stay in her life, and gradually increased our contact as she remained sober.

I gave her a new chance because I wanted a parent. (my father died when i started high school and they had been divorced since i was in 5th grade). But I reminded her of the ultimatum i gave her when i left that horrible place the first time. I reminded her of future weddings, grand children she would never meet, a life she would never be apart of...

Lately i've been picking up on warning signs that my mother is not so sober like she claims...

• Sniffing glasses before she pours the "water" into her iorn... to make sure its water...
• Not really coherent on the phone when its not late on her days off...

so I "ran-sacked her house" (went through all the old hiding places and some new ones ) and found 4 bottles of her alcohol of choice. I left the bottles hidden this time, but I did hide numbers on the bottles (my mom's eyes aren't that good) so I can see how much she's drinking. I need to have some kind of proof for what i'm going to do.

i'm going to do weekly ran-sacks of her place till my lease is up... I won't give her an excuse to say "it was only that one time." I need to show her the pattern of her drinking so she can't talk me out of it because I will hold to my word.

I'll move in for a month or so and continue to monitor it (this way i can find a place since my current apt complex has a waiting list and know for sure).

I already have a roommate lined up. The Double

I'll rent a new place without her knowing, slowly move all my stuff out, change the mailing address on everything.

After that's done, i'll pack up what's left, change my auto insurance over to the new place and wait for her to come home from work. She will see the empty room, the bag by the door. I'll show her what I know, Tell her how I've marked the bottles over the past few months, and I'll tell her that I can't do it anymore.

I'll leave her my keys, she'll have my number if she needs to get a hold of me if there is an emergency...